This Trouble Goes To Eleven – Review Of Doctor Who 7.1 “Asylum Of The Daleks”
(Ed. Note – This review will be spoily woily, which is like timey wimey or explodey wodey or whatever, but with more spoilers. Starting pretty much immediately. You’ve been warned.)
Last night was the premiere of Doctor Who season 7. Last night was also the night I discovered that Layer Cake Wines makes an excellent, if powerful, Grenache that will knock you on your ass and make it very difficult to post a review in real time, let alone live tweet it. This is probably just as well, given the number of folks I saw in my Twitter stream threatening to do awful things to those who might post any hint of spoilers that might ruin their own personal viewing experience when they get around to finally watching it themselves, in their own good time. For example:
.@davemaulding @sizzlerkistler Yeah, I haven’t watched it yet. I’ll be blocking and cursing anyone who spoils it for me.
— Janna O’Shea (@dreamyeyed) September 2, 2012
But, it’s a whole new day and I’m sober. Therefore, I feel I should dispense with the niceties and warn everyone up front that last night we learned that The Doctor regenerates and comes back as Raptor Jesus. Also, the Ponds discover they can assemble themselves into Voltron. Oh, and The Doctor’s new companion is a Dalek.
One of these things may or may not be true.
Read the rest of my actual review, after the jump!
Hi. I’m Foreshadowing. Nice to meet you.
The episode opens on the burnt out remains of Skaro, homeworld of the Daleks. The Doctor meets a hot redhead who claims to have escaped from a Dalek prison camp. Turns out she’s the most recent release of Dalek Beta Gold and the glowing blue eyestalk that erupts from her forehead is a feature, not a bug. The Doctor is captured in short order, as are Rory and Amy back on Earth. Oh, and I should mention that the Ponds are in the process of getting a divorce. More on that later.
The Doctor and companions discover that they’ve been tasked with saving the Daleks from other, more crazy Daleks (yes, somehow this is a thing) who have been kept on an entire planet that has been turned into a prison. There’s been a breach in the security force field that surrounds the planet because of a shipwreck by humans. It’s just big enough to let crazy Daleks out, but not big enough to send a bomb through. Convenient. Oh, and the off switch for the force field that will allow them to nuke the site from orbit is located down on the planet. Really Daleks, who designed your security? Did you assimilate some Trekkie Red Shirt with a sense of humor? “Ha! You see what I did there? Who has to go down to the scary planet and get his ass killed now, bitch?” Apparently, not the Daleks.
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