Episode 113: Jack Daniels Is My Agatha Harkness

It has been a stone bummer of a week when it comes to comic news. From the tragic loss of Darwyn Cooke to DC Comics having to release a statement on sexual harassment in the face of protests over allegations about Superman Group Editor Eddie Berganza, there haven’t been a lot of smiles in comics this week. Hell, when the most welcome news is that Supergirl was renewed and only has to reduce their budget and expatriate to Canada, you’re not talking a barrel of laughs.

But these things all happened, so we talk about them. Particularly the DC Comics harassment issue, as one of us was once harassed in the manner and circumstances in which Berganza is accused of harassing someone back in 2012, and therefore we wanted to share our perspective on it.

But we hate dwelling on negatives in our favorite hobby, so we spend more time than usual talking about actual comics this week, discussing:

• Southern Bastards #14, written by Jason Aaron with art by Jason Latour,
• The Vision #7, written by Tom King with art by Michael Walsh,
• Starfire #12, written by Amanda Conner and Jimmy Palmiotti with art by Elsa Charretier, and
• Powers #6, written by Brian Michael Bendis with art by Michael Avon Oeming!

And, the disclaimers:

• This show contains spoilers. We will ruin the ending of the latest Powers story line for you… but then again, since it’s been seven months since the last issue, you probably don’t remember how the story line started.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and therefore is not safe for work. Sure, the concept of a “kitten chaser” sounds benign, but do you want to risk your employment on it? Didn’t think so. Buy earphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:22:48 — 78.0MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Episode 112: Civil War, or: I Found Vibe On JDate

It feels like only yesterday that we were discussing why a movie about superheroes fighting each other was a painful, depressing and contrived experience, doesn’t it? Well, good news! We can put Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice out of our minds, because we’ve got another movie about superheroes trying to kick each other in the junk!

Captain America: Civil War opened in the United States last week, so in the interest of equal time with Batman V. Superman, we have brought back the same guests we discussed that movie with: comedians Ross Garmil and Benari Poulten!

In a much different discussion than we had about Civil War’s DC counterpart, we all talk about what worked with the movie, the few parts that didn’t, how 20 minutes of Spider-Man in this flick feels more true to the character that his preceding ten hours of film appearances, how the last person we saw as quickly and thoroughly defeated as one of Civil War’s heroes was Shelley Levine from Glengarry Glen Ross, and how Civil War is, figuratively and (somewhat) literally, Marvel’s The Empire Strikes Back.

And, as always, the disclaimers:

• This show contains spoilers. Like, we will ruin the entirety of Civil War for you. We’ll tell you who gets killed. We’ll tell you who gets crippled. We’ll tell you who teaches The Vision how to love with a floppy copy of Conficker and a tube of Astroglide. We’ll tell you which of the three preceding plot points is false.
• The show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. Picture your mom hearing four adults cackling about the Astroglide thing. Yeah, buy some ear buds.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:43:41 — 95.9MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

We’re Stacking Boxes, Carl

Due to an unexpected commitment, this week’s show is not quite ready. We’ll finish editing and will post it later today.

Sorry for the unexpected further delay.

You’ve Got A Mother, Don’t You, Punk?

Our show this week will be about Captain America: Civil War, with guests who, at this point, are regulars for our shows about the big comic book / superhero flicks: comedians Benari Poulten and Ross Garmil.

But here’s the thing: this is Mother’s Day. Which means that navigating the litany of commitments, not only to see the movie, but to convince our mothers that the eighteen years they spent on us were valued and that we should remain firmly in the will, was difficult at best.

We will be recording the show tonight, and it will be available, here and where finer podcasts are distributed, tomorrow night.

Sorry for the delay. And yes, despite ugly and slanderous rumors about being grown in a vat and raised by a pack of North American Trash Panda Raccoons, even I have a mother.

Episode 111: Tom Wopat Is Zoom

After a busy week of vacationing, video gaming, and day job hunting, we are back, just in time to deal with the latest comics vs. filmed adaptation battle!

If you are a fan of The CW’s The Flash, you know that the current storyline involves Zoom from Earth-2, and his relationship to Golden Age Flash Jay Garrick. There was quite a twist around that relationship in the show, and it’s one that infuriated long-time Flash comic book writer Mark Waid, who complained that it was a betrayal of Garrick’s comic book past.

And while this is unique given that it comes from a comic creator, it reminded us about years and years of comic fan outrage over differences between the comics we love and the adaptations that they beget… and yet it also reminded us that some movies and TV shows based on our favorite characters have made much bigger changes than have happened on The Flash, and yet no one seemed to mind.

So in between fan outrage over Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice and fan excitement over Captain America: Civil War, we talk about what makes we fans excited about some adaptations and nitpick over others, and why we’re okay when Superman kills Zod in Superman II but not in Man of Steel.

We also discuss:

• Batman #51, written by Scott Snyder with art by Greg Capullo, and:
• 4 Kids Walk Into A Bank #1 written by Matthew Rosenberg with art by Tyler Boss!

And, as usual, the disclaimers:

• This show contains spoilers. If you don’t want to find out about plot points in The Flash, or who has the title of The One True Ringworm, tread lightly.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your mom to know who or what “The DIck Flash” is? Then get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:46:04 — 99.9MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Is It A Game, or Is It Real?

Here’s an interesting fact: no matter how much you might have dreamed, at twelve years old in 1983, that you might someday reach the day when you could spend an entire weekend at the biggest video arcade in the world, with unlimited tokens with which to attack the Tron machine? That dream probably didn’t include being 44 years old and capable of being physically exhausted from playing that Tron machine… and yet no more capable of clearing the third level than you were in the days when Bruce Boxleitner was considered a viable theatrical box office draw.

My point is that we we spent the last weekend of our vacation at Funspot in New Hampshire playing classic 80s video games, and didn’t wind up getting home until much later than expected last night. As such, we didn’t have time to record a new show this weekend, and what with not only being back at our day jobs, but being back there with a week’s worth of work to catch up on, well, we need to punt on this week’s episode.

Thanks for your patience, and stay tuned for a new episode this weekend!

Episode 110: How Do You Solve A Problem Like A Negan?

We have been fans of The Walking Dead since the seventh issue of the comic book. That means that we have hung in with Rick Grimes and company, and their doomed world, for literally almost twelve years. We’ve stuck with them through prisons, and horrors performed in Woodbury, and the semi-friendly takeover of Alexandria, and All-Out War, and The Whisperers. For more than a quarter of our lives. Which meant we were surprised last week, after the conclusion of season six of The Walking Dead series, the opening of Fear The Walking Dead season two, and the release of the comic’s 153rd issue, when Rob said he might not have the wherewithal to watch these people take a beating anymore.

So this week, we examine the state of The Walking Dead. From the TV show’s introduction of Negan and the extended beating that probably means for Rick and company, to Fear The Walking Dead and how its prequel nature means that we will be spending 18 episodes with people we know are doomed to wind up in the world of The Walking Dead no matter what they try, to the comic and its reintroduction not only of Negan, but his “costume” and weapon. And we discuss whether the story, in all its incarnations, has finally become so bleak, depressing and hopeless to want to follow. And we talk about whether the comic book has been transformed from a story into a property, making it impossible to ever end in a satisfying manner.

We also discuss:

• Moon Knight #1, written by Jeff Lemire with art by Greg Smallwood and Jordie Bellaire, and:
• Jackpot! #1, written by Ray Fawkes with art by Marco Failla!

And, the disclaimers:

• This show contains huge spoilers for the end of The Walking Dead season six, the opening of Fear The Walking Dead season 2, and big ol’ chunks of the Walking Dead comic. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, be aware the we will ruin the fact that the world of The Walking Dead is a stone cold bummer.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your boss to learn about “The Thighs of Death”? Then get some Headphones of Continued Employment.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:53:39 — 105.2MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

…A Buck Short

Look, I’m not gonna lie to you: we’re on vacation here at the Crisis On Infinite Midlives Home Office. Normally that wouldn’t preclude us from having a show up on time, but since Amanda is also feeling a little under the weather, well, we’re gonna need a little extra time.

But we’ll give you the same answer we give our bookie: we’ll have what we promised for you by tomorrow night at the latest, thanks for being so patient and understanding, PLEASE NOT OUR LEGS WE NEED OUR LEGS TO KICK ASS…

Ahem. The new episode will be up by tomorrow night, we swear.

Episode 109: Aliens Vs. Predator Vs. My Little Pony

Convention season has been underway for a few weeks now, but what with Image Expo happening this past Wednesday in Seattle, followed almost immediately by Emerald City Comicon happening only days later in the same city, this is one of the bigger weeks for comics news we’ve had in quite a while.

So while we tried to distract ourselves from our disappointment that we were unable to finagle a trip across the country to see these conventions in person with a viewing of The Death of Superman Lives: What Happened?, we still found ourselves following the comics news about the announcements coming from each event.

And there was a ton of announcements, from new crime comics from the creators of 100 Bullets, to a bunch of maps and financial documents surrounded by a comic book by Jonathan Hickman, to a story about the Six Million Dollar Man written by a man with experience writing about someone who wants to become a real boy.

We also discuss:

• Black Panther #1, written by Ta-Nehisi Coates, with art by Brian Stelfreeze, and:
• The Fix #1, written by Nick Spencer, with art by Steve Lieber!

And, the normal disclaimers:

• This show contains spoilers. If you don’t want to hear why The Black Monday Murders by Jonathan Hickman will be the comic most likely to give you maps and sadness, tread lightly.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your boss to hear about why it’s awesome to consume Incompetence Porn? Then get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:46:54 — 99.3MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Episode 108: Your Mother Works At Applebees, or: Dissecting Batman V Superman

If you’ve listened to this show for any length of time, you know that Rob has long been a defender of Man of Steel as potentially an excellent Superman movie, provided that we would eventually discover in subsequent sequels that Superman learned from the events of that movie to become more of the hero that we all know from the comics.

Well, the first sequel, Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice, was released last week, finally answering the question as to whether Rob’s faith in Man of Steel was justified. And I think we all know the answer to that question.

But it’s still a question worth probing. So this week, we’re joined by longtime friends of the show, comedians Ross Garmil and Benari Poulten, not to praise Batman V Superman, but to bury it. And while we all agree that there were some positive aspects to the movie (hi, Wonder Woman!), it is far outweighed by plot problems, a Lex Luthor who wants to be The Joker when he grows up, and a Superman who will do anything to defend Justice provided “Justice” is Lois Lane’s stripper name. If nothing else, it made us nostalgic for Christopher Reeve’s version of Superman, or at least Joe Kelly’s version in What’s So Funny About Truth, Justice and The American Way?

And, as usual, the disclaimers:

• Benari was unexpectedly trapped in an area with terrible Internet access, requiring him to join us by telephone. While the call quality was clear and never drops out in the episode, it will sound like one of us is, well, calling in on the phone.
• This show contains huge spoilers. So if you don’t want to find out why we suspect that the ship Superman rode to Earth was called the USS Joe Chill, see the movie before listening.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. If you don’t want your employer to learn the terms, “Bat Christ” or “Batman: The Gay Blade,” get yourself some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:46:18 — 100.3MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!