Flaming: Fantastic Four #600 Review

I have decided that when I die, I want someone at Marvel to write my obituary. Because that will mean that I won’t be dead for very fucking long.

Yeah, The Human Torch is alive again, but we’ll get to that in a minute.

I haven’t reviewed any of the issues in Jonathan Hickman’s run of Fantastic Four before because honestly? It just hasn’t hooked me in. I’ve given it a try because the book has been part of my pulls since Mark Waid’s and Mike Wieringo’s run, so I’ve sort of been getting it by default. And I read it every month, but there’s something about ir that just doesn’t stick to my brain. I’ll grant that alcohol might be a factor, but considering not ten seconds ago I was asked, and able, to recall the Libby’s jingle from the 1970’s, I doubt booze is just attacking my memories of Hickman on FF. Hopefully.

I’ve certainly given Hickman’s writing an honest chance. On top of Fantastic Four, I’ve been reading his book Red Wing by Image, and I’ve picked up trades of his miniseries Red Mass for Mars and Pax Humana. All of which are big idea comics, with intricate clockwork plots that pull together seamlessly… and to a one populated with characters that feel to me like ciphers that exist purely to further those plots. They are impeccable works of engineering, yet oddly bloodless, like a high-end silicone fuck doll: there are people who swear by them, but I was born a blow-up doll man, and I’ll die a blow-up doll man. And lonely. But I digress.

There are five disparate parts in this issue – one of them advances up a storyline that’s been building for a while that includes a Kree invasion, the Inhumans, and an alternate universe version of Reed Richards – because nothing’s less confusing than making your villain not only indistinguishable from your hero, but actually the same fucking guy.

But the money shot is the return of Johnny Storm from the dead after eight months, which to be fair is about seven months and three weeks longer than Marvel left Bucky and Thor dead.

I wasn’t particularly looking forward to this issue because, after being beaten about the head and neck with superhero deaths and rebirths in Marvel books over the past month, I didn’t anticipate this one having any more impact than those others, particularly since Hickman’s character work, for me, leaves a little to be desired.

So I was pleasantly surprised at how much I liked the Johnny’s return story and the fill in as to what happened to him. I don’t know if Hickman feels an affinity for The Human Torch or if it’s as simple as the fact that inheriting a character with a fifty-year backstory means he had enough to work with to fill in where he usually fails for me… or if that backstory gave me enough as a reader to bring in what usually isn’t there.

Either way, the particular chapter that details how Johnny survived and returned gives the character more balls, and his sacrifice more emotional impact than any part of Fear Itself… other than the part when I finally realized that Fear Itself was over.

The other stories here are generally acceptable, although I didn’t feel like there was anything to the Inhumans chapter that I needed to care about. The tease about a “Galactus Seed” (Which only made me think about a “Galactus Sock” and get me all queasy) possibly meaning a second Galactus might have been exciting… had we not just spent a year in a story about a second Reed Richards. But then again, that’s Marvel for you these days: they don’t reboot, they just create new versions of characters to go along with the originals (Scarlet Spider. Red Hulk. Moon Knight. Wait – that’s not a duplicate, it’s a ripoff. But I digress).

Where the rubber hits the road, I wouldn’t necessarily recommend buying this if you haven’t been following Fantastic Four; hell, I have been following it and I can barely keep track of what’s going on. But if you’ve ever had any interest in the character of Johnny Storm, and you can swallow spending seven bucks for one-fifth of a comic, that chapter alone is worth the price of admission. And it’s enough promise and good character work to keep the book on my pull list… for now.