Rhymes With Jism, or: Let’s Fist Again

Newsarama’s got a preview of the first few pages of the finale to X-Men: Schism, the big second tier event Marvel’s running alongside Fear Itself… or maybe it’s the third tier event; in the Spider-Man books, Marvel’s running Spider Island, or: “Deadline? Um… Fuck It; EVERYONE’S Got Spider Powers! I’ll Be At The Bar Until My Check Clears!”

I’m gonna be honest with you: I don’t really follow the X-Men. That’s Amanda’s department. But I like Jason Aaron’s writing (If you’re not reading Scalped, you’re failing at comics), so I’ve been reading this one and generally enjoying it because you can’t go wrong with stories about evil children. Because ALL CHILDREN ARE EVIL; they steal your freedom and your beer and comics money for frivilous things like food and pants. That’s why I encase all my children in latex and flush them down the toilet before they can whimper at me. But I digress. Because I have been drinking. Anyway…

The big Marvel teasers for the new Blue and Gold X-Men teams have pretty much let on that Schism is gonna lead to a public split between Wolverine and Cyclops, which is a fight that even X-Men dabblers who’ve seen the first two flicks have been waiting for for years. And the preview shows that it’s gonna be everything we’ve all been hoping for… provided you look at it when you’re not:

1. A comedian, or:
2. Drunk

So let’s break it down*: Wolverine and Cyke stare deeply into each other’s eyes.

Wolverine leans in.

Cyclops takes his hand, then looks deeply into Logan’s eyes.

They stare intently at each other, holding each other’s hands, waiting for the other to yield…

Then a third party comes in to fist them both.

X-Men: Schism #5 drops on October 5th (via Newsarama)

*Seriously, I am enjoying this book, and am kinda looking forward to Regenesis to see if it can hold my attention the way any non-Joss Whedon X-Men have… but let this be an object lesson in releasing unlettered preview art.