Harley Quinn and Suicide Squad

Ding Dong - Candygram!

Wow! Check out Harley Quinn on the cover of “Suicide Squad” #1! That’s quite a makeover you’ve undergone there, ma’am. Trying something different to regain the Joker’s interest after his disappearance in Detective Comics #1, huh? It’s a good look – and I don’t just mean the multi-tonal hair and the push up, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it bustier (and, just between us girls – how do you keep that on when swinging that sledgehammer? I have a running theory that involves dress tape and transdermal snap implants – am I close?). No, I mean that extra sprinkling of crazy. It looks good on you, and I’m not just saying that because you’re holding a knife. Really.

 

 

 

And Harley’s not the only one who looks different. Look at Floyd Lawton, aka Deadshot:

Just another day at the office for Deadshot.

Floyd has decided that he's never getting his chest waxed again for anybody.

No mustache! Where will this insanity end?

Suicide Squad, written by Adam Glass with art by Federico Dallocchio, Ransom Getty, and Scott Hanna, relaunches everyone’s favorite government chaperoned brigade of loose cannon super losers villains with a team that includes Harley Quinn, Deadshot, Warrior Monk, King Shark, Black Spider and Voltaic (who, I don’t really know much about other than he is apparently not just a Bjork album). The story traces, within their own separate storylines, how Harley, Deadshot and Warrior Monk each got busted, as well their subsequent imprisonment, leading to placement as candidates for Task Force X – the Suicide Squad. Stuff ‘splodes; dudes get kicked. But, the only character that I found compelling in this first meeting of the ensemble was Harley, who is going on a slash-and-dance festival that targets any lawyer in Gotham she feels was responsible for taking the Joker away from her. Black Canary arrests her as she sits in a puddle of blood, dead guy in her arms like a giant carnival teddy bear, feeling sorry for herself. I should be repelled, but found myself, curiously, wanting to offer her some Häagen-Dazs and inviting her over to watch Beaches. What? Somebody dies of cancer in that movie. It might cheer Harley up.

I suppose time will tell, but, the character that I was looking forward to the most, Deadshot, was surprisingly lackluster in this issue. Where’s the mouth? Is the best bravado you can offer me from Deadshot a “your mama” line? Really?

That's right.  Deadshot is fucking your mom.

What? It is possible his mom hired Deadshot. Especially after last Thanksgiving...

And the disappointments don’t end there. Guess which of these pictures is Amanda Waller in this issue:

(image via Comics Alliance)I'm sure this has nothing to do with the fact that Angela Bassett was hired to be Amanda Waller in Green Lantern. And it sure helped that movie, too!

Comics Alliance has decided that this new take on Waller is because there are no fat chicks allowed in the new DCU. I know I’m kind of irritated about it. I liked The Wall. She was hardcore. She knows who Batman is! And she doesn’t even own a Lazarus Pit. She didn’t have to be hot (or “hawt!”) to get ahead. She did it the old fashioned way: taking advantage of the good ol’ government corruption career opportunity ladder I’m personally hoping that the stress of having to keep Harley and company in check causes her to eat her way back up to fighting weight, and pretty fucking quick. This book gets one more week and then I’m saving my money for my own damn Häagen-Dazs.

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