Magic, Broken Human Beings And Sacrifices On The Altar Of Revenue – Review Of Justice League Dark #2

Something dark and malevolent is afoot in the DCU, and it’s not just the continued employment of Rob Liefield despite any evidence of an ability to utilize symmetry or feet in any of his attempts at artwork. No, I’m speaking of magical nasties that defy even the efforts of the heavy hitting Big Three to put down. In Justice League Dark, magically powered individuals have to join together to defeat an out of control, seemingly insane villain, the witch known as The Enchantress. But is she really the Big Bad that is causing reality to come undone or the victim of some other, similarly damaged, reality challenged, spelling slinging powerhouse?

Spoilery goodness after the jump!

…And Sometimes Chicks DRIVE The Car

The only people who would argue that Justin Bieber isn’t a destructive purveyor of  impending doom do not have penises, secondary sexual characteristics, or are trolling pederasts.

He turns music into sadness, the car radio’s scan button into a perverse game of auditory Russian Roulette, and legitimizes Rebecca Black. His ability to turn everything he touches into shit – apparently by sucking all the money out of it –  makes me wish I were dead, if only so I could, as an incorporeal ghost, slip into his mansion in the dark of night and wake him by whispering “Leeeeiiiiiiifff… Gaaaaarrretttttt…”

Ruining music is forgivable. Making CSI unwatchable is something I could skate past. But now Justin Bieber has done the indefensible.

He has ruined the fucking Batmobile.