Good Long-Term Plans And Crappy Short-Term Ones: Daredevil #17 Review

Daredevil has consistently been one of the best comics you can get since Mark Waid took over the writing last year, and it has been that way at least partially because Waid made a conscious choice to turn the character away from the noir darkness that has defined it since Frank Miller’s run in the 80s. There was a long run on this book where the writers seemed to make a conscious choice that God hated Matt Murdock, and Matt Murdock would respond to this divine hatred with the grace and aplomb of a gutshot bath salts addict with terminal neurologically-based vertigo.

In the last issue, Waid moved straight past the noir-influenced obstacles of bitchy, damaged hot girls and random betrayals straight into pulp: someone dug up his dad and put his remains in Murdock’s desk for Murdock’s partner Foggy to find. Foggy, predictably, flipped out and kicked Matt out of the law firm… which until recently would be the trigger mechanism for the writer to have Daredevil become homeless, or excessively violent, or to bang Typhoid Mary in Peter Parker’s house while Captain America pounds on the door to serve a subpoena.

In Daredevil #17, however, Waid zigs where everyone else would zag, delivering a flashback story that ultimately reinforces Daredevil’s new, more upbeat attitude and personality in a believable and organic way… albeit being kind of a goofy story with some real holes in it.

Dirty Mego Is Now A Thing: Robot Chicken / DC Comics Special Trailer

If there is a show on television that has repeatedly demonstrated its comic geek cred, it’s Robot Chicken. From the sketch of the members of the Justice League as the cast of The Real World to the Hollywood Spotlight on The Hulk, you have to respect Seth Green’s commitment to comics, even though at SDCC I had to wait around for five minutes in my hotel lobby while his bodyguards cockblocked me from the elevators in the hotel I, you know, was a paid and registered guest in, so they could guarantee that Mr. Green got to ride to his hotel room in comfort. All the while ignoring my plaintive whimpers about my scrotum being stuck to my left leg. But that’s not important right now.

What’s important is that, after a couple of Star Wars related specials, Robot Chicken is doing a DC Comics special. And not only that, DC Comics’s Chief Creative Officer did some work on the special, meaning that we are likely to see Aquaman finally breaking off a piece of that sweet, sweet Catwoman ass, opening a filthy joke singularity of the words “fish” and “pussy”.

Look: if you’re a fan of the show, you’re gonna watch it anyway. But if you’re not, the official trailer for the special has been released, and you can get a taste of what you’re in for (hint: if includes crotch shots. Literally.) after the jump.

Face Melting: Raiders of The Lost Ark In IMAX For One Week

The Indiana Jones trilogy, plus some other movie with Shia LaBeouf that I refuse to admit exists, is coming out on Blu-Ray in a high-definition transfer on September 18th, But rather than simply passively suck in all that sweet, sweet free money from people like me who will buy the new set despite having owned it on both VHS and DVD (y’know, minus that fourth “bonus” disc that none of us will ever, ever watch), director Steven Spielberg will be releasing the remastered Raiders of The Lost Ark in AMC IMAX theaters for one week only, starting September 7th.

On one hand this is good news… except for the fact that no matter how good the new HD IMAX transfer looks, it still means that I’ll be in a dark room seeing seven-foot spiders crawling on Alfred Molina’s back without even the benefit of PCP-sprayed dirtweed to blame. But the problem is that Spielberg and Raiders producer George Lucas have a… shall we say reputation… for taking the opportunity that a digital remaster offers to a filmmaker to make a few tweaks, adjustments and terrible abominations to the original film. Let’s just say that I was Elliot’s age when E.T.: The Extra Terrestrial was originally released, and if I were riding my bike and came across an FBI agent in a suit carrying a walkie-talkie? I’d have saved E.T.’s energy and just mowed the giant pussy down.

The Crow Said Don’t Look: The Crow #1 and #2 Review

Having read the first two issues in the latest in a 20-plus year long line of comic books with the title The Crow, I find it ironic that the original book was about a soul that could not rest until he found justice… or at least revenge.

The original Crow miniseries by James O’Barr is a personal favorite, and the 1992 Tundra Publishing reprints of the original Caliber Press printings are prized possessions in my collection. It is a personal favorite because it is simple, and it is self-contained: a dude in the wrong place at the wrong time gets killed along with his girlfriend for no reason at all, and he somehow returns from the grave to kill the gang who killed them. That’s it. Who is the guy? Doesn’t matter, to the point where O’Barr doesn’t even tell us his last name (“Draven” only came about in the 1994 movie, that felt it needed to shoehorn in unnecessary backstory for the straights in the theaters). Why is he killed? Just some random violence from some random junkies; could’ve been anyone, anywhere. Why does he come back? His love for his girl is just that strong, brother. It was simple, and it was emotional, it was powerful… and then it was done.

It was everything that this new comic version of The Crow is not.

10 Minutes To Midnight

Ok, Rob actually managed to get a review of Rorschach #1 up this evening, so I hope you’ve enjoyed that. Our local comic book store owner, who knows us by name and asks Rob frequently to stop setting Comedian #1+#2 on fire in the store, because it’s a felony or something, will be as relieved shocked as you to see that he enjoyed it. But, beyond that, Rob’s all passed out now, so it’s up to me to tell you that we’re excited about books like Amazing Spider-Man #691 and Walking Dead #101, and even AvX #9…although not so much about Wonder Woman #12. The Crisis On Infinite Midlives Home Office is going to take up a tin cup collection to see that Brian Azzarello only writes Rorschach for the forseeable future. But in the meantime this:

is the end of the broadcast day. We’ll see you on the other side.

ps.  Yes.  That is an old school War Games movie poster, actual production motherfucking one-sheet, you see in the vinyl cover to the upper right. You may commence with your jealousy…now.

Revenge Of The Blot: Rorschach #1 Review

Considering how I felt about Brian Azzarello’s take on my favorite Watchmen character, The Comedian, I opened Rorschach #1 with my knife already out and sharpened. Considering how many plot and character liberties Azzarello has been taking with The Comedian, I opened this comic book fully expecting to see something like Rorschach battling Blofeld from SPECTRE in Munich while jockeying a rocketpack and firing his laser watch at the angry flying sharks. All while Rorschach weeps moronically while reciting Nietzsche to lolcats.

Turns out it’s not like that. Instead, Azzarello has made the connection that the Keene Act that stopped costumed adventuring in the Watchmen universe was passed in 1977, and New York City, where Rorschach was operating as a street-level crimefighter, was a terrible, terrible place in 1977. It was the New York of Taxi Driver and Son of Sam and a Times Square where a tourist could get fistfucked by a transvestite hooker instead of the retail markup at the Disney Store. It was a New York of grindhouse theaters, and Azzarello has given Rorschach a grindhouse story in which he can star. And God help me, it’s really pretty damn good.

Space Madness: Space Punisher #2 Review

I missed the first issue of Space Punisher for a few reasons, the biggest of which being that it was a book called Space Punisher.

Seriously: if all you know about the book is that it’s called Space Punisher, why would you buy it? At face value, it sounds like someone decided to fire the 616 Universe Frank Castle into space so he could try to kill the Guardians of The Galaxy or something, probably in the service of trying to get someone to give a tin shit about the Guardians of The Galaxy before Marvel Studios spends a hundred million bucks making a movie about them. It wasn’t until I saw Space Punisher writer Frank Tieri talking about the book at the Amazing Spider-Man panel at SDCC that I understood that this was an Elseworlds-style book, about an entirely different version of Frank Castle, who happened to be a starship captain. “Think Buck Rogers if Buck Rogers really screwed up,” Tieri said at the panel.

So I decided to give Space Punisher #2 a day in court, and sure enough: it’s about a version of The Punisher who happens to be in space. But the space setting is really the only thing different in the story, which is simultaneously a strength to the story, as well as its biggest problem.

New Arrow TV Trailer: Because We Need Our Live Action Supes Fix Post TDKR

In the lull that follows the movie industry’s summer blockbuster, nigh hangover inducing after the likes of The Amazing Spider-Man, The Avengers, and The Dark Knight Rises, television network CW releases the most recent trailer for its great fall season hope, Arrow. Yes, it’s a new take on Green Arrow. Marketing apparently thought dropping the “Green” would make it sound more bad ass or something. But it’s still got the bones of the familiar story. Oliver Queen has been trapped on a deserted island somewhere on the ocean, north of China, for five years. That’s long enough to grow some stylin’ facial hair, hone his archery skills, and develop a taste for those little crabs that live in tidal pools vigilante justice! CW shoehorns in Dinah Lance (that’s the eventual Black Canary to the five of you who might watch this that are unfamiliar with the comic book) as an ex-girlfriend. We may see Speedy in the form of a druggie sibling. Wonder if the druggie sibling is going to lose an arm and have a child with a super villain? Now that would be bad ass.

Anyway, check out the new trailer after the jump.

Animalistic Man: Deadpool Kills The Marvel Universe #2 Review

Editor’s Note: The house chimichanga contains carnitas, refried beans and tasty, tasty spoilers! 

This won’t be a long review, but it doesn’t have to be. Because Deadpool Kills The Marvel Universe #2 is just plain old big, stupid, violent fun. Sure, it’s fun with a conceit behind it that’s straight out of Grant Morrison’s classic Animal Man run from the 80s, but the straight lift doesn’t take away from what is a breezy, kill-em-all shoot-em-up.

This issue continues an Elseworlds-style story where experimentation on Deadpool has altered the nature of the voices in his head, changing them from a constant call for chimichangas and boobies to one to kill every pair of spandex pants in the Marvel Universe. On one hand, this actually leads to a less overtly humorous version of Deadpool – a lot of the fun in a normal Deadpool comic comes from his whacky and over-the-top internal dialogue, whereas here, the voices in his head say things like, “It doesn’t matter. They all have to die.” You know: boring, day-to-day repetitive shit like the voices in my head.

Occupy Comics: Archer & Armstrong #1 Review

Archer & Armstrong #1 is a book you’ll probably like if you spent a lot of time camping out during the Occupy protests, or if you’re an active commenter on Pharyngula, because it tells a story that reinforces everything you already “know”: Evangelical Creationist Christians are obese, easily duped tools of the wealthy who are actively conspiring to become even wealthier, even if it means destroying everything and everyone to do it.

It’s gonna be likable to that particular demographic the same way that hardcore American conservatives like Atlas Shrugged – it tells you what you want to hear… but like those Ayn Rand books, just because it gives you a warm, affirming fuzzy feeling about your personal life choices doesn’t mean it’s a good fucking story.