The Shape of Things To Come: The Legend of Luther Strode #1 Review

If The Strange Talent of Luther Strode was the origin tale of an 80s slasher film-style killing machine wrapped up in a superhero story, then it would stand to reason that the sequel would have to be the actual horror movie. This is a somewhat tricky proposition, because despite the similarities between a superhero and a slasher flick villain – on a mission, with a distinctive outfit and / or mask, and apparently indestructible – a horror movie is not a superhero story.

In a slasher film, the killer is “other,” appearing from out of nowhere and picking off the people who are the primary protagonists and the focus of the story. Further, while many if not most of the victims might, for whatever reason, “need killing” (for having sex or smoking pot or drinking underage – hey Mom! You were right! I do need killing!), there needs to be one character for whom the audience is invested and pulling for to escape, if not defeat, the unstoppable force in the shadows. And it is one hell of a proposition to try to tell a story about a superhero in a story format where you have to not only stick him in the background, but find someone you like enough to hope that she (because it’s always a “she” who winds up facing down the killer in slasher films, isn’t it?) kills your hero.

If I were Luther Strode writer Justin Jordan, I would look at these challenges, smile, cut my losses and walk away. However, in the first issue of The Legend of Luther Strode, he instead embraces the story structure of a slasher film, taking the risk of pulling focus away from Luther and putting it on his “victims,” and gives us an antagonist for Luther who, at this point anyway, I wouldn’t mind seeing maybe win.

But again, the question is: does the slasher story format work in what is ostensibly a superhero comic?

Plague Bunny: Stan Sakai On Usagi Yojimbo Hiatus

Crisis On Infinite Midlives contributor Trebuchet has been dealing with some health problems over the past few months, and is about to undergo a surgical procedure to resolve them (although we who have known him for a long while believe that the most beneficial surgery he could undergo would be the one that locates his balls).

While Trebuchet swears that the procedure is minor with a good prognosis, we have been looking for a Get Well gift for him. Since we know that he is not the world’s biggest superhero comics fan, and we further know that he is a fan of the Dark Horse comic Usagi Yojimbo, it would seem that a few new issues of that book would be a gimme. Problem is: Usagi Yojimbo creator Stan Sakai has taken a break from that book to work on 47 Ronin with Dark Horse Comics publisher Mike Richardson. Now that is some crappy timing.

Thankfully, rather than putting us into the position of having to explain the lack of Usagi Yojimbo comics to Trebuchet, Sakai has jumped into his own creation to explain the break to its title character. An partial explanation of which you can get a taste after the jump.

The Captain The Federation Deserves: Star Trek Into Darkness Teaser Trailers Released

There’s nothing like the holiday season, and its attendant shopping, travel, insufferable parties, rotten fruitcake, family gatherings, family arguments, family recriminations, family embarrassment, and, well, family, that makes the heart yearn for summer blockbuster movie season.

And Hollywood knows this. This is why they spend millions on new Christmas movies (not that I begrudge Tim Allen a living), on funnelling It’s A Wonderful Life onto every second-rate expanded cable channel in America from Thanksgiving until about Valentine’s Day, and its why your local oldies radio station alternates playing Paul McCartney’s Wonderful Christmastime and Bing Crosby’s White Christmas from the day after Halloween until the smile on the face of the clerk at your local convenience store begins looking suspiciously like a silent prayer for the sweet release of death.

They want you to feel that level of despair so that, when they give you a tease of the big, explodey action of the summer flicks, you become disproportionately excited over the idea of big sun, long days, and starship captains blowing up bad guys.

And in that spirit, the first teaser trailer for Star Trek Into Darkness has been released… along with a little something extra for people in a country where Christmas is a time you spend with your boss instead of your family. Those lucky motherfuckers.

With Great Power Comes Great Bedsores: The Amazing Spider-Man #699 Review

Editor’s Note: Hey Amanda – have I done the “Amazing Spoiler-Man” gag for a spoiler warning yet? No? Jesus, how the fuck have I left that one on the table? No, I’m not gonna do it NOW, I gave it away already! I’ll just tell people that this review is loaded with spoilers. Right after I pour another whiskey.

Here’s the problem with hype: ever since The Amazing Spider-Man #699 was available in stores yesterday morning, Dan Slott’s Twitter feed has been ablaze with cries of “Oh God! You bastard! That’s the most disgusting thing I’ve ever seen!” and “I threw up when I saw IT,” and “Follow me for slutty cam vids!” Okay, that last one might have been from Twitter pornbot Diane’s Slot, but that’s beside the point.

The point is, if all you have to go on it the online hype, you would think that Amazing Spider-Man #699 was a bloody slugfest in the final battle before the book goes tits up in favor of Superior Spider-Man at the end of the month, but that’s not the case. Make no mistake: that moment that people are shrieking about is in the book. And it is… yeah, we’ll go with the adjective “disturbing.” But I won’t spoil the moment here, because despite the hype, it isn’t germane to the story. Which is actually a pretty solid middle part to a story that Marvel promises will “change Spider-Man forever,” or at least until three months after The Amazing Spider-Man 2 shows up in movie theaters and reminds people that there’s money in the character the way he’s always been.

Four-Color Riot

If you believe the shitstorm of rage, hatred and recrimination coming from The Amazing Spider-Man writer Dan Slott’s Twitter feed since the comic stores opened at about 10 a.m. today, it would make you think that The Amazing Spider-Man #699, like The Clash in 1978, was the Only Thing That Matters. And, as the second-to-last issue of The Amazing Spider-Man as an ongoing comics concern (until someone realizes they might make an extra seventeen dollars out of Amazing Spider-Man #725), it is certainly an important comic book – and one we will be addressing in the very near future – but certainly not the only comic book of the week that matters.

Not when Luther Fucking Strode is back in the house.

Which is a long way to go to explain that this wealth of awesome…

…means the end of our broadcast day.

Seriously: this might be the most interesting week of new comics in quite a long time. Not only is there the new Amazing Spider-Man and the first issue of the second Luther Strode miniseries, but there’s the first issues of the renumbered (but not rebooted! Marvel doesn’t reboot! And the editorial staff of Crisis On Infinite Midlives hasn’t been drinking since four minutes after leaving the comic store!) Avengers and Thunderbolts (starring Punisher, Elektra and Deadpool), along with the third issue of Daredevil: End of Days by Brian Michael Bendis, and the latest Hawkeye by Matt Fraction!

But before we can review them, we need time to read them. So until we have that chance…

…see you tomorrow, suckers!

Seasickness: Aquaman #14 Review

Editor’s Note: One last review of the comics of November 28, 2012 before the comic store opens with the new stuff today…

I have never understood the general enthusiasm over the New 52 reboot of Aquaman, even though my co-editor Amanda liked it enough at the start to mutter things like, “Hero’s Journey” and “Joseph Campbell” and a bunch of other stuff that made me wish I’d learned more in college than the fluid dynamics surrounding beer bongs. For me, the sudden DC focus on Aquaman, who has never been able to support his own book for very long (his longest running self-titled book lasted 75 issues – about six years) stunk of a Trading Places-style Gentlemen’s Wager between Geoff Johns and Dan DiDio: “I will wager you, sir, one American dollar that I can transform this water-sucking, fishfucking, orange-pantsed fashion victim into a proper superhero!”

So I read the first few issues and then kind of tuned out – and I’ve just realized that I’ve said that about no less than three New 52 books in the past couple of weeks, which might be a topic for another time – but with Throne of Atlantis, the next big Justice League arc, on its way, I decided to check out Aquaman #14 to bone up and get a sense of what’s going on with the book.

The short answer? I have no fucking idea.

New Avengers! Well, Not “New Avengers”, But New Avengers! New Old Avengers! Third Base! Screw It, Here’s A Trailer

Marvel’s first post-Bendis issue of Avengers, written by Jonathan Hickman and drawn by Jerome Opena, will be in comic stores tomorrow. But is Marvel taking it easy and banking on the fact that the pre-Marvel Now version of the book was one of their bigger sellers, or that its being written by one of their A-List creators, or that it shares the name with a near-billion dollar movie that just came out just six months ago to sell the thing? Fuck no; that would be lazy. Besides, why rest on your laurels and prior achievements when you’ve got motion comics algorithms, a microphone with a dude with a semi-deep voice, and possibly and purely by speculation a pile of pure flake cocaine burning holes in your pocket and / or nose (if you believe the rumor that I made up just now)?

Stack on top of those assets about 15,000 comic Web sites looking for something cool to talk about on a lazy night before New Comics Day, and it means that Marvel’s created a trailer for Avengers #1, which you can check out after the jump.

Zombie Apocalypse: Batman Incorporated #5 Review

Editor’s Note: Babylon falls! The spoilers you defended are meaningless!

Back in 2007. Batman #666 kind of came out of nowhere, clearly a result of Grant Morrison realizing he was writing a issue numbered “666”, rubbing his hands together and cackling gleefully around a mouthful of peyote.

Batman #666 introduced Damian Wayne as Batman, having taken over the mantle after some unexplained thing happened to Bruce Wayne fifteen years in the future. Damian is a gun-toting, trenchcoat-wearing lethal version of Batman, who has sold his soul to the devil and must battle a demon for the future of Gotham City… and none of that description, by the way, is an Issac Hayes style euphemism to make Damian sound tough; these are things that actually happened. Imagine listening to the Theme From Shaft and feeling the slowly-dawning horror when you realize that John Shaft actually fucked his mother. And apparently did it badly. Yeah. Welcome to shoot-first, sell-your-soul-to-Satan-even-sooner Batman.

The whole issue was kind of a goof, and as a gimmick issue, the whole thing kind of came and went without further comment in the story arc. But due to the asskicking nature of Damian as Batman, the issue has become a fan favorite (not my favorite, but your mileage may vary), and I don’t think a San Diego Comic-Con that had Morrison in attendance has gone by without some fan asking when we would see Damian’s Batman again. To which Morrison would reply: “Schoor toor ach Damian fchoor ich dloor Mescaline schaar ploor Scotland.” Dude has one hell of an accent is all I’m saying, but I digress.

Well, their wait is over. Batman Incorporated #5 is Morrison’s version of The Dark Knight Returns for Damian’s version of Batman, It is the imaginary final battle for that version of Batman, featuring his final conflict against his most dangerous antagonist with the fate of Gotham City hanging in the balance. However, unlike Frank Miller’s classic, Morrison accomplishes it in less than 20 pages (appropriate for a character who showed up for about 20 pages more than five years ago), and considering it tells the story of an apocryphal version of Batman who exists purely thanks to a vagary of issue numbering, it is surprisingly effective.

Post No Bills: Star Trek Into Darkness and Man Of Steel Posters Released

It’s getting to be the end of 2012, which means two things. First, it’s the time of year to get ripped to the tits on egg nog and try to convince the local constabulary that I just got some bad Boston Cream Pie, and second: it’s time for next summer’s genre movies to start dropping teaser posters.

And yesterday gave a wealth of still-framed, Photoshopped, Public Relations Department approved brain candy that starts the geek glands a-drooling while showing us absolutely nothing of concrete value. And in that spirit, we at Crisis On Infinite Midlives are happy to present two new teaser posters, both after the jump.

A Queasy, Unbalanced Feeling: Karen Berger Leaves Vertigo Comics

It’s been while since the 1990s glory days of Vertigo Comics, when books like Sandman, Hellblazer, Shade The Changing Man, Y: The Last Man and Preacher stomped on the terra and helped solidify the concept that comics weren’t for children anymore. These days, it feels like Vertigo is down to what feels like a few miniseries, some original graphic novels and Fables, and with the recent announcement of the cancellation of Hellblazer, it has seemed like the imprint has been at a crossroads. And, as anyone who’s ever listened to Robert Johnson knows, good shit never happens at the crossroads.

And today is living proof. DC Comics has announced that Karen Berger, the longtime Executive Editor of Vertigo Comics, is leaving the company at the end of first quarter 2013.

DC’s official announcement is after the jump.