Episode 100: There Is No Bikini Waxing in Fairyland

All right, it’s our one hundredth episode. Let’s not make a thing out of it. Seriously: we don’t. Sure, we spend a few minutes reflecting on where we are and where we came from, and maybe have a little too much Liquid Celebration to commemorate making it this far, but honestly? There was too much comics and genre news this week to spend too much time naval gazing.

We start off by discussing this week’s announcement that Star Wars: Episode VIII has been delayed from May to December, 2017. We talk about how the rumor is that the screenwriters want to rework the story to focus more on Finn and Poe, and how the move is a slap in the face to the fortieth anniversary of the debut of Star Wars… but mostly we talk about how waiting for a Star Wars movie is different when you stop being half a decade away from being just a glint in your dad’s eye and start being half a decade away from being a card-carrying member of AARP.

We move on to the news that Doctor Who showrunner Steven Moffat is leaving the show in favor of writer and longtime fan Chris Chibnall… eventually. You know, after 2016, when there will only be a Christmas special. And after Moffat’s farewell season sometime in 2017. Chibnall really should read The Late Shift, that’s all we’re saying.

But that’s not all! Being that kind of week, it was also when Bleeding Cool ran some stories about DC Comics maybe rebooting the DC Universe, maybe returning it to its post-Crisis, pre-New 52 state… or maybe about them doing not very much at all. So we discuss the rumors versus the actual concrete knowledge, and wind up bemoaning the idea of comics that slavishly follow their movie and television counterparts.

And on the comic book front, we discuss:

• Batman #48, written by Scott Snyder with art by Greg Capullo,
• Titans Hunt #4, written by Dan Abnett with art by Stephen Segovia, and:
• I Hate Fairyland #4, written and drawn by Skottie Young!

And, even after 100 episodes, the disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you’re used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like learning that, on some level, the only difference between Star Wars and Barney Miller is finger counting.
• This show contains spoilers. We try to give you warnings ahead of time, but go into this assuming that we are going to screw up your ability to think of Star Wars without contemplating the sweet release of death.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. Do you think your employer’s life will be enriched by learning the origin of the phrase, “The Wet Thunk”? Then get yourself some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:33:58 — 89.6MB)

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Thanks for listening for 100 episodes, suckers!

Episode 99: Thing Ring, Do Your Ring Job

Secret Wars #9 was released this week, marking the official end of the Marvel Universe as created by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby (or by Kirby and Lee, depending on whose version you prefer) in the November, 1961 issue of Fantastic Four #1.

Purely by coincidence, this was also the week that our local comic store put used copies of the first two volumes of Marvel’s Essential Fantastic Four reprints on sale. And also purely by coincidence, this was the week we obtained a copy of last year’s Josh Trank-directed movie version of Fantastic Four, with the original plan being to watch it so we could, in good conscience, list it as our worst genre movie of 2015.

However, with both the beginning and the end of Stan and Jack’s Fantastic Four and Marvel Universe in our hands, as well as this wretched little celluloid deviation, we decided it was a perfect time to revisit the team, how much of the Marvel Universe just those first few issues laid down for decades to come, how the comic really was a product of its time (and how the movie was proof of that), and how Jonathan Hickman laid those characters, as they have been since 1961, to rest. And, ultimately, we discuss whether this team, that was born during the Space Race, when Kennedy was President and World War II was closer in history than the Y2K Bug is to us today, could have a future in 2016.

And now, the disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like a discussion why Sue Storm makes Helen of Troy look like Willie Lumpkin.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, be aware that we will spoil the fact that the Fantastic Four movie just sucks.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and therefore is not safe for work. See that “Ring Job” in the title? Don’t let your boss hear about that. Get some earphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:54:41 — 106.1MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Episode 98: The Wang Splash

A long time ago, when we barely had the equipment to record people who weren’t in the same room with us, we interviewed a couple of comic creators who were on the cusp of releasing their first print comic through a proper comic book publisher. It was also our first interview with comic creators, on new and untested equipment, and even though everyone involved was on untrod ground, it was one hell of a lot of fun.

Now, a year later, we have much better and more trusted equipment, and a lot more experience talking to people remotely. In addition, those two creators not only released their comic, but got the greenlight to publish a sequel, a bunch of good press around the book, and visited San Diego Comic-Con. And since they are now on the cusp of releasing the trade paperback of the sequel to their first comic, it seemed like a good time to check back in and see how the last year of relative success in comics affected them.

So in this episode, we talk with Holy F*ck and Holy F*cked creators Nick Marino and Daniel Arruda Massa, ostensibly to talk about the impending release of the trade paperback of Holy F*cked…  but we also get into what it’s like to have some success in a local indie comics community, the pros and cons of variant covers for indie comics, how 90s comics affected Generation X vs. Generation Y, how San Diego Comic-Con arguably isn’t as big a deal for mid-level creators as it is for anyone else, and acting in reality TV. Oh, and we talk about how Crisis On Infinite Midlives might be the cause of one of the more graphic and talked-about panels in Holy F*cked.

Amanda and Rob also discuss:

• Spider-Man / Deadpool #1, written by Joe Kelly with art by Ed McGuinness, and:
• Swamp Thing #1, written by Len Wein with art by Kelley Jones!

And now, the disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing (although we edited a tangent out of our interview that made no sense if you weren’t on the live video feed at the time). While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like not just a discussion about man-nipples, but a year-long continuation of a discussion about man-nipples.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to yell out warnings ahead of time, just assume you will learn which son of a god will be crucified in Holy F*cked (helpful hint: the answer will totally surprise you!).
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want to explain to your boss the particular Facts of Life that lead to a baby named “Rad Christ”? Then buy headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 2:10:58 — 124.5MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Episode 97: The Stink of Zan and Jayna: The 2015 Crises Awards

2015 is officially ended, and we are celebrating it in the way we lived through it: squealing with glee and complaining with vigor, all through an alcohol and Sudafed-induced haze. That’s right: it’s time for the Second Annual Crises Awards!

2015 was an eventful year for comic and genre fans; a year where, in many categories, the concept of “worst” really means “least good,” and where sometimes “good enough” makes all the difference in the world (You’re still a piece of $%*!, Kylo Ren!). So Amanda and I put together our lists of the best and worst that 2015 had to offer! All to the soundtrack of awful, terrible, public domain and / or fair use awards show sounds!

In this episode, we award and argue about:

• Best and Worst Comic Book or Genre Movie,
• Best and Worst Comic Book or Genre TV show,
• Best and Worst Comic Event or Crossover,
• Best and Worst Story Arc or Graphic Novel, and
• Most Anticipated and Most Dreaded Geek Events in 2016!

And, awards show or no, we’ve gotta have the disclaimers:

• We recorded this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you’re used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like yet another story from Amanda’s childhood (spoiler alert: it’s heartbreaking!).
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, let’s face reality: we’re talking about an entire year’s worth of genre entertainment. If it’s been a year, it’s your own damn fault.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. We talk about the Fantastic Four movie. You want your boss to hear language like that? Get some earbuds.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 2:21:08 — 131.1MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Episode 96: Weeping Angel Facepalm

While we originally planned to list our 2015 Crises awards for the best and worst of the year this week, we were stymied by a combination of holiday travel for Rob, and a crippling cold (and cold medicine high) by Amanda.

So after spending some time talking about what we got for Christmas, and best Christmas memories from childhood (spoiler: none of Amanda’s childhood memories are anything but heartbreaking and hilarious), we talk about the Doctor Who Christmas special, The Husbands of River Song. We talk about the episode’s weird mix of farce and heartstring plucking, how it might mean some solid writing on showrunner Steven Moffat’s part to tie River’s character closely to her first appearance, and how it paints the Doctor as a remorseless and opportunistic genocidal monster. Really.

We also discuss:

• DK III #2, written by Frank Miller and Brian Azzarello, with pencils by Andy Kubert and inks by Klaus Janson,
• Teen Titans #15, written by Scott Lobdell and Will Pfeifer with art by Ian Churchill and Miguel Mendonca, and:
• Darth Vader #14, written by Kieron Gillen with art by Salvador Larroca!

And, the usual disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like the tragic tale of a girl, pseudoephedrine and a busted Etch-A-Sketch.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just assume that we will explain, in detail, why The Doctor is history’s greatest monster.
• This show contains adult, profane language and is therefore not safe for work. You want your employer to know what it means when things go “testacularly”? Then get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:42:59 — 93.7MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Episode 95: Kylo Ren is a Piece of…

We all know that, if you are of the comic book and genre entertainment persuasion, the only Goddamned thing you and we are talking about is the premiere of Star Wars: The Force Awakens. It has been three years and two months since The Mouse bought a galaxy far, far away, and with that kind of time to anticipate a movie, what did you think we were going to talk about?

We are joined this week with guests:

• Boston comedian Ross Garmil,
• New York comedian and Nightly Show With Larry Wilmore staffer Benari Poulten, and:
• longtime friends of the show Trebuchet and Pixiestyx!

And we spend a couple of hours talking about The Force Awakens. Specifically, who we think Rey is the daughter of, who we think is behind The First Order, how the non-speaking players are better than they’ve ever been, how Kylo Ren is a real jerk (a kneebiter, if you will), and a bunch of other Star Wars stuff!

Be warned: This show is full of spoilers. If you haven’t seen Star Wars: The Force Awakens, give this show a pass. Seriously. Assume the first two words we utter are the names of who gets killed.

And, for even more disclaimers:

• We recorded this show live to tape, with minimal editing (although there’s a little extra post-processing in effect this week, thanks to our furnace unexpectedly turning on). While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like the speculation about where a tube sock might figure into the Rey’s origin.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your boss to hear speculation about Rey’s origin that not only would ruin the new movie, but his or her ability to enjoy an adult relationship for quite some time? Get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:50:26 — 105.3MB)

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Enjoy the show, suckers!

Episode 94: Through A Haggis Darkly

After weeks of renovations here at the All-New, All-Different Crisis On Infinite Midlives Home Office, we had a relatively quiet few days for a change. So we took the opportunity to catch up on Doctor Who season 9, the second with Peter Capaldi as The Doctor and the last with Jenna Coleman as Clara, although unlike when other Companions have made their curtain calls, I suspect we’ll be seeing Clara again. Soon.

So we spend a good chunk of the episode talking about the season, including its two-episode story structure, the circumstances of Clara leaving The Doctor, why putting a gun in The Doctor’s hand is lazy writing, why Maisie Williams would make an excellent Doctor, and how showrunner Steven Moffat apparently thinks there’s a Jackrabbit Slims on every street corner in America. Most importantly, we lay out why penultimate episode Heaven Sent is a an unholy plot-holed mess in The Girl Who Waited clothing.

We also discuss:

• Scarlet Witch #1, written by James Robinson with art by Vanesa Del Ray, and:
• Constantine The Hellblazer #7, written by James Tynion IV and Ming Doyle, with art by Brian Level and Riley Rossmo!

And now, the usual disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like discussing whether Maisie Williams’s character had an unfortunate encounter with stripper glitter, a Bedazzler or a nose piercing.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, be aware that there are reasons we discuss who would be the best actress to portray a female Doctor.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your employer to hear what is aggressively pouring out of John Constantine’s drain? You do not. Get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:30:51 — 83.2MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Episode 93: Cinematic Elephantiasis

Yes, we are late this week, and for that we apologize. Here at the All-New, All-Different Crisis On Infinite Midlives Home Office, renovations continue… and continue… and continue, meaning that our recording studio was covered in painters’ tarp and plastic up until this morning.

But we are back in business, and wanted to make sure that we talked about the new trailer and teaser for Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice that dropped last week. After all, we are among the few defenders of director Zack Snyder’s Man of Steel, so we wanted to talk about how the new footage affected our enthusiasm for the movie, which drops in March.

As it turns out, the answer to that is: “badly.”

We also discuss:

• Daredevil #1, written by Charles Soule with art by Ron Garney,
• The Totally Awesome Hulk #1, written by Grek Pak with art by Frank Cho, and,
• Robin War #1, written by Tom King with various artists!

And, as always, the disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like the domestication of the wily Pseudo-Winklevoss.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just assume we will ruin everything you love and care about.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. While I think we present a compelling case as to why Armie Hammer would be an ideal choice to front a Frank Miller-ish reboot of Home Alone, do you think your employer cares? Of course not. Get some ear buds.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:26:57 — 78.5MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Episode 92: …And Then There Were Skrulls

While we are still in the throes of The Neverending Move, and therefore somewhat distractible (Hi, Fallout 4! Let me spend hours up in you, trying to find our new Home Office!), it would take more than a month living out of boxes to keep us from noticing the first trailer for Captain America: Civil War, or as we like to call it, Avengers 2.5.

We spent a good chunk of time watching, and rewatching, and rewatching the trailer, and spend some time discussing how it not only already looks better than the comic from which it came, by dint of the fact that Tony Stark isn’t suddenly acting like an amoral fascist just to advance a plot (Hi, Mark  Millar!), but how it seems like a weird time to mess up the MCU superhero status quo given that their next Earth-level superhero flick is more than a year after Civil War. We also speculate which side everyone will land on, and discuss why, if the Russo Brothers don’t use Mike Colter’s Luke Cage the way Brian Michael Bendis used Cage in Civil War, they are Goddamned fools.

We also discuss:

• DK III #1, written by Frank Miller and Brian Azzarello, with pencils by Andy Kubert and inks by Klaus Janson,
• Jacked #1, written by Eric Kripke with art by John Higgins, and:
• Who would win in a drinking contest: Demon In A Bottle Tony Stark, or Alias‘s Jessica Jones (Yes, this was a weird show)!

And now, the disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like learning why Starfox could outdrink Rocket Raccoon (It’s not why you think! It’s filthy!)
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just be aware you will learn the secret origin of Phil Coulson’s Vanity Vehicle.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. Seriously: the whole Starfox / Rocket Raccoon thing is just awful. Get some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:34:12 — 83.1MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!

Episode 91: At The End Of The Day, I’m Just Not A Ninja

Yes, we are back. And yes, it has been a long time. Thanks to the horrors of moving, which include misplaced boxes, emergency repairs, rescheduled workmen, and the Fickle Fingering of XFinity, we are only just now able to return to the Internet Airwaves. Thankfully, it was just in time to binge-watch Netflix’s and Marvel Studios’ Jessica Jones, which dropped its entire first season this past Friday.

So we discuss the series, including how, like with Daredevil, it seems about three episodes too long. We talk about how the series compares to Alias, the Brian Michael Bendis-written comic book the series was based on. And we go over how the story works not only as a classic film noir where the femme fatale is actually the hero, and how it can be seen as a tacit examination and deconstruction of Doctor Who.

We also discuss:

• Secret Six #8, written by Gail SImone with art by Dale Eaglesham and Tom Derenick, and:
• Star Wars: Vader Down #1, written by Jason Aaron with art by Mike Deodato, Jr.!

And now, the disclaimers:

• We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like discovering why “Comcast” is an unholy word.
• This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just go into this assuming that we will ruin not only Jessica Jones for you, but also 666 Park Avenue and diaper fetishism.
• This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your boss to hear a sentence that contains the phrases, “railed,” “in the,” and “heat pump?” Get yourself some headphones.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:18:20 — 70.3MB)

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Thanks for listening, suckers!