Wow, did you see that Super Bowl the other night? Didn’t you think it was amazing when the New England Patriots came from behind to defeat the Atlanta Falcons, after being behind for the entire game? Didn’t you think it was amazing?

Yeah, neither did we. Or at least, Neither did Rob. Because, like a technical genius, he decided to upgrade this Web site literally nine minutes before kickoff. And, being Rob, he fucked it all up.

So he spent a large part of Super Bowl Sunday just getting the site to work again. And a large part of Super Bowl Hangover Monday making it so podcasts would have their feed again. And a small part of Let’s Pretend To Be Sick At Work So We Can Attend The Patriots Rally In Boston Tuesday making sure that new podcasts would be added to the feed when they were put “on the air.”

And all of that seems to be working… but it meant that we had no time to actually prepare for an actual podcast this week, let alone have a place in which we could broadcast it.

However: we will be back on Monday with a new show, mostly complaining about the new DC / Warner Bros. show Powerless,

secret_empire_promoYes, we are late after a weird weekend, but we still have a good show for you! A show barely prepared for, fueled by caffeine and alcohol, but as far as shows go: this is one!

Anyway, for the past few years, DC Films seems to have gauged whether or not to proceed making live action films of some of their lesser-known comics properties by releasing direct-to-video animated versions of them to see if they’ll stick. They did it with Suicide Squad three years ago, and now they’re doing it with the cast of the proposed Dark Universe movie with Justice League Dark, which was released last week.

We are big John Constantine fans (and kinda fans of the New 52 Justice League Dark), so we watched the movie and discuss the return of Matt Ryan to the role, how Batman fits into a mostly magical cast, why Black Orchid is almost literally filler, and why seeing Green Lantern being lightly tazed is almost always worth nearly any price of admission.

In addition: this week gave us the first two issues of what will become Marvel’s next event, Secret Empire. We have been nothing if not vocal here about how much a bummer Civil War II was, and now that we’re staring down the barrel of a story about a literal Nazi taking over the United States, well, we have strong opinions. And we even try to have those strong opinions without talking too much about current American politics.

As a palate cleanser, we also discuss Deathstroke #11, written by Priest, with pencils by Denys Cowan and inks by Bill Sienkiewicz!

But here’s the disclosures:

  • This show contains spoilers. If you don’t want to know why spending a few months with Nazi Captain America might be a depressing idea, you have been warned.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. If you don’t want to explain to your mom why “catharsis: isn’t the same as some form of “reaching around”, then listen in your car or something.

Thanks for listening, suckers!

captain_america_1_cover_1941It was a weird week for comics and genre news. Having recorded this episode one day before the announcement of the official title of the new Star Wars movie (spoiler alert: the spoiler is that the title is Star Wars: The Last Jedi), the only comics related news was whether it was still kosher, so to speak, to sucker-punch a Nazi, Captain America style.

(Editor’s Note: we discuss the Nazi-punching issue very, very briefly, only to come to the conclusion that, to paraphrase a famous American: if Jake Blues does it, it cannot be illegal.)

So this week, we skip most of the news, and go straight to the comics. We discuss:

  • Batman #15, written by Tom King with art by Mitch Gerads,
  • The Amazing Spider-Man: The Clone Conspiracy #4, written by Dan Slott with art by Jim Cheung,
  • The Ray: Rebirth #1, written by Steve Orlando with art by Stephen Byrne,
  • Angel: Season 11 #1, written by Corinna Bechko with art by Geraldo Borges, and:
  • Curse Words #1, written by Charles Soule with art by Ryan Browne!

And, as always, the disclaimers:

  • This show contains spoilers. If you don’t want to find out why, thanks to Catwoman, Batman is no longer the M Night Shaymalan, turn back now.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. If you don’t want your significant other to learn what happens when you mix juniper and romilar, get some of those Airpods or something.

Thanks for listening, suckers!

homer_superman_shirtIt’s awards season, and you know what that means: networks will cynically use the concept of an awards show to fill time by looking back at old entertainment rather than looking forward and creating something new. By which we mean: welcome to the third annual Crisis On Infinite Midlives Crises awards!

2016 was a weird year for comics and genre entertainment: there was some spectacular work from areas that no one would have guessed even a year ago, and some real garbage fires from people and organizations who one would think we could count on. And we go back and sift through all of it, one last time, before we move onward and upward into an uncertain year where Wolverine will retire, Spider-Man will come home, Warren Ellis will regain his authority, and we choose to believe that General Leia Organa will, to coin a phrase, just fade away.

In this episode, we discuss:

  • Best and worst comic series / miniseries
  • Best and worst comic event
  • Best single issue
  • Best and worst genre movie
  • Best and worst genre TV
  • Biggest surprise and disappointment of 2016, and:
  • Most and least anticipated entertainments of 2017!

And, the disclaimers:

  • This show contains spoilers. That said: this show contains discussions about all comics and genre entertainment of 2016. You’ve had a lot of time to get up to speed here. Still and all: consider yourself warned.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. We talk about CIvil War II and Spider-Clones here, which means we’ll use language that will get you fired. Get some headphones.

Thanks for listening, suckers!

Sorry for the lack of an episode this week; Amanda became ill with a fairly significant cold, right as Boston was hit with the first solid winter storm of the season requiring me to shovel, so by the time showtime rolled around, neither of us was in much condition to talk comics.

But Amanda is recovering nicely, and I am once again able to feel my lower back. So we will be back next Monday with our annual Crises awards! Our Lifetime Achievement Award is still open, so if any comics pro wants to pull a Streep at Dan DiDio or Axel Alonso, hit us up ASAP! We need the press!

doctor_who_doctor_mysterio_poster_2016It is the holiday season, and while that means things like delayed flights, family political battles and regifting, it also means the annual Doctor Who Christmas Special. And this year’s, The Return of Doctor Mysterio, was a double whammy: not only was it the first Doctor Who story in almost a year, but it was about an American superhero.

So we discuss the story, both on a Doctor Who and a superhero story level. And while we don’t want to spoil anything, we learn that there’s a reason why it’s maybe not a good idea for a British television writer to tackle an American superhero story. We’re guessing it’s the same reason it wouldn’t be a good idea for the guy who created The Cape to write an episode of Doctor Who.

We also discuss:

  • Civil War II #8 written by Brian Michael Bendis with art by David Marquez, and:
  • DK III: The Master Race #7, written by Frank Miller and Brian Azzarello, with art by Adam Kubert, Klaus Janson and Frank Miller!

And, the usual disclaimers:

  • This show contains spoilers. So if you don’t want to know who loses at the end of Civil War II, you should avoid this show. And probably mirrors.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and this therefore not safe for work. Unless you think your mom wants to know what Marti Noxon might do with Naked Batman, maybe use your holiday Airpods.

Happy New Year, suckers!

Due to the holiday (and a delayed flight), there won’t be a new episode this week. 

We should be back with a new one next week. You know, assuming an airline that will remain nameless can, between now and then, find the wherewithal to take off on time from a straight runway on a clear day.

walrus_manRogue One: A Star Wars Story opened this past weekend, and, if you’re any kind of regular listener to the show, you know that we’re from Generation X, and therefore addicted to Star Wars. And not only that, but everyone we know is from Generation X and feels the same way. And luckily, most of the people we know are professional stand-up comedians.

So this week, we’re joined not only by frequent guest, New York comedian Benari Poulten, but a long time friend, Boston comedian and original member of the Star Wars Fan Club Greg Boggis. And while we’re Star Wars fans all, we all had differing levels of enthusiasm for this movie, differing levels of advance knowledge about the flick, and certainly differences of opinion about what we wanted from the first live-action Star Wars movie that didn’t follow the main plot.

So we discuss the movie, how it fit into out own personal Star Wars canon, whether or not we’re sick of lightsabers, how to deal with Cutscene Tarkin and Realdoll Leia, and the hazards of living in a world of Stormtroopers in a stop and frisk world where walking while blue is a crime.

And, as always, the disclaimers:

  • This show contains massive spoilers about Rogue One almost from the first minute, So if you don’t want to be spoiled about any plot points, well, clearly you accidentally Googled “comics podcasts” instead of “comics pornography.” Retry your search.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. No one ever got promoted when their boss heard a few northeastern comedians screaming about False Flag Rex Trailer. So, for your career’s sake, get some headphones.

Thanks for listening, suckers!

spider_man_homecoming_poster

“That’s what I love about these [Spider-Men], man… I get older, they stay the same age.” -Michael Keaton (unconfirmed) (probably made up) (I totally made this up)

So we’re on our third person playing Spider-Man since the last time we had a Glutton Bowl, which seems not only unfair, but kinda wasteful. However, this time we have a Spider-Man working within the Marvel Cinematic Universe, played by an actual (almost) teenager, and who seems able to tell a joke better than, “Hi! I am Tobey Maguire, and I am seventeen years old! Why are you looking at me like that?”

And since the first trailers for Spider-Man: Homecoming were released last week, we spend a few minutes talking about some of the details, how some elements of Brian Michael Bendis’s Mile Morales seem to have been integrated into Peter Parker’s story, how cool it is to see Michael Keaton in a real superhero movie again, and how none of this gets around the truth about how hard it is to get excited about our third Peter Parker less than ten years.

But talking about a trailer does not a podcast make. So we also discuss:

  • Spider-Man: The Clone Conspiracy #3, written by Dan Slott with art by Jim Cheung,
  • Wonder Woman ’77 and The Bionic Woman, written by Andy Mangels with art by Judit Tondora,
  • Batman #12, written by Tom King with art by Mikel Janin, and:
  • Star Wars: Doctor Aphra #1, written by Kieron Gillen with art by Kev Walker and Salvador Larroca!

And, as always, the disclaimers:

  • This show contains spoilers. If you don’t want to know who The Jackal offers to resurrect for Spider-Man, then you’re clearly not thinking about The Clone Conspiracy even a little bit, but still: consider yourself warned.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. If you think your mom might be disturbed to hear what its like to “pull a trailer for Lyle Waggoner,” then get yourself some earbuds.

Thanks for listening, suckers!

dcw_invasionAfter a year of superheroes beating on each other in comic books and in not one, but two different cinematic universes, sometimes you just need a good, old-fashioned superhero team-up. You know, where the good guys fight each other at first because of a misunderstanding or mind control or something, then they come together to fight seemingly insurmountable odds, and finally defeat the bad guys.

Some comic publishers seem light on their ability to publish such stories recently (hi, Marvel!), but thankfully, the people in charge of the DC Arrowverse shows on The CW network have us covered. The Invasion! crossover between Arrow, The Flash, Supergirl and DC’s Legends of Tomorrow took place this week, and gave us heroes from four shows and two Earths coming together to battle aliens, the government, and the after effects of time travel. Not to be confused with the after effects of physical travel; you might suffer Montezuma’s Revenge as a result of either, but only one involves a stone axe and your face.

So we discuss the crossover: what worked and what didn’t, what plot points were genius and which were purely for storytelling expediency, which characters and actors shared excellent chemistry, and who should be given more to do considering he once played Superman, for God’s sake.

We also discuss:

  • The Totally Awesome Hulk #12, written by Greg Pak with art by Mahmud Asrar, and:
  • Inhumans Vs. X-Men #0, written by Charles Soule with art by Kenneth Rocafort!

Alas, the disclaimers:

  • This show contains spoilers. If you don’t want to learn why the greatest weapon against an alien invasion might be just one damn pocket? Watch Invasion! before listening and consider yourself duly warned.
  • We use adult, profane language, so therefore this show is not safe for work. You want your mom to hear us talk about the emotional resonance behind an X-Man trying to get themselves hard as fast as they can? Then get some headphones.

Thanks for listening, suckers!