doctor_who_christmas_special_2015While we originally planned to list our 2015 Crises awards for the best and worst of the year this week, we were stymied by a combination of holiday travel for Rob, and a crippling cold (and cold medicine high) by Amanda.

So after spending some time talking about what we got for Christmas, and best Christmas memories from childhood (spoiler: none of Amanda’s childhood memories are anything but heartbreaking and hilarious), we talk about the Doctor Who Christmas special, The Husbands of River Song. We talk about the episode’s weird mix of farce and heartstring plucking, how it might mean some solid writing on showrunner Steven Moffat’s part to tie River’s character closely to her first appearance, and how it paints the Doctor as a remorseless and opportunistic genocidal monster. Really.

We also discuss:

  • DK III #2, written by Frank Miller and Brian Azzarello, with pencils by Andy Kubert and inks by Klaus Janson,
  • Teen Titans #15, written by Scott Lobdell and Will Pfeifer with art by Ian Churchill and Miguel Mendonca, and:
  • Darth Vader #14, written by Kieron Gillen with art by Salvador Larroca!

And, the usual disclaimers:

  • We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like the tragic tale of a girl, pseudoephedrine and a busted Etch-A-Sketch.
  • This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just assume that we will explain, in detail, why The Doctor is history’s greatest monster.
  • This show contains adult, profane language and is therefore not safe for work. You want your employer to know what it means when things go “testacularly”? Then get some headphones.
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star_wars_force_awakens_wideWe all know that, if you are of the comic book and genre entertainment persuasion, the only Goddamned thing you and we are talking about is the premiere of Star Wars: The Force Awakens. It has been three years and two months since The Mouse bought a galaxy far, far away, and with that kind of time to anticipate a movie, what did you think we were going to talk about?

We are joined this week with guests:

  • Boston comedian Ross Garmil,
  • New York comedian and Nightly Show With Larry Wilmore staffer Benari Poulten, and:
  • longtime friends of the show Trebuchet and Pixiestyx!

And we spend a couple of hours talking about The Force Awakens. Specifically, who we think Rey is the daughter of, who we think is behind The First Order, how the non-speaking players are better than they’ve ever been, how Kylo Ren is a real jerk (a kneebiter, if you will), and a bunch of other Star Wars stuff!

Be warned: This show is full of spoilers. If you haven’t seen Star Wars: The Force Awakens, give this show a pass. Seriously. Assume the first two words we utter are the names of who gets killed.

And, for even more disclaimers:

  • We recorded this show live to tape, with minimal editing (although there’s a little extra post-processing in effect this week, thanks to our furnace unexpectedly turning on). While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like the speculation about where a tube sock might figure into the Rey’s origin.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your boss to hear speculation about Rey’s origin that not only would ruin the new movie, but his or her ability to enjoy an adult relationship for quite some time? Get some headphones.
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doctor_who_guitarAfter weeks of renovations here at the All-New, All-Different Crisis On Infinite Midlives Home Office, we had a relatively quiet few days for a change. So we took the opportunity to catch up on Doctor Who season 9, the second with Peter Capaldi as The Doctor and the last with Jenna Coleman as Clara, although unlike when other Companions have made their curtain calls, I suspect we’ll be seeing Clara again. Soon.

So we spend a good chunk of the episode talking about the season, including its two-episode story structure, the circumstances of Clara leaving The Doctor, why putting a gun in The Doctor’s hand is lazy writing, why Maisie Williams would make an excellent Doctor, and how showrunner Steven Moffat apparently thinks there’s a Jackrabbit Slims on every street corner in America. Most importantly, we lay out why penultimate episode Heaven Sent is a an unholy plot-holed mess in The Girl Who Waited clothing.

We also discuss:

  • Scarlet Witch #1, written by James Robinson with art by Vanesa Del Ray, and:
  • Constantine The Hellblazer #7, written by James Tynion IV and Ming Doyle, with art by Brian Level and Riley Rossmo!

And now, the usual disclaimers:

  • We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like discussing whether Maisie Williams’s character had an unfortunate encounter with stripper glitter, a Bedazzler or a nose piercing.
  • This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, be aware that there are reasons we discuss who would be the best actress to portray a female Doctor.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your employer to hear what is aggressively pouring out of John Constantine’s drain? You do not. Get some headphones.
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batman_v_superman_dawn_of_justice_promoYes, we are late this week, and for that we apologize. Here at the All-New, All-Different Crisis On Infinite Midlives Home Office, renovations continue… and continue… and continue, meaning that our recording studio was covered in painters’ tarp and plastic up until this morning.

But we are back in business, and wanted to make sure that we talked about the new trailer and teaser for Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice that dropped last week. After all, we are among the few defenders of director Zack Snyder’s Man of Steel, so we wanted to talk about how the new footage affected our enthusiasm for the movie, which drops in March.

As it turns out, the answer to that is: “badly.”

We also discuss:

  • Daredevil #1, written by Charles Soule with art by Ron Garney,
  • The Totally Awesome Hulk #1, written by Grek Pak with art by Frank Cho, and,
  • Robin War #1, written by Tom King with various artists!

And, as always, the disclaimers:

  • We record this show live to tape with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like the domestication of the wily Pseudo-Winklevoss.
  • This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just assume we will ruin everything you love and care about.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. While I think we present a compelling case as to why Armie Hammer would be an ideal choice to front a Frank Miller-ish reboot of Home Alone, do you think your employer cares? Of course not. Get some ear buds.
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captain_america_civil_war_teaserWhile we are still in the throes of The Neverending Move, and therefore somewhat distractible (Hi, Fallout 4! Let me spend hours up in you, trying to find our new Home Office!), it would take more than a month living out of boxes to keep us from noticing the first trailer for Captain America: Civil War, or as we like to call it, Avengers 2.5.

We spent a good chunk of time watching, and rewatching, and rewatching the trailer, and spend some time discussing how it not only already looks better than the comic from which it came, by dint of the fact that Tony Stark isn’t suddenly acting like an amoral fascist just to advance a plot (Hi, Mark  Millar!), but how it seems like a weird time to mess up the MCU superhero status quo given that their next Earth-level superhero flick is more than a year after Civil War. We also speculate which side everyone will land on, and discuss why, if the Russo Brothers don’t use Mike Colter’s Luke Cage the way Brian Michael Bendis used Cage in Civil War, they are Goddamned fools.

We also discuss:

  • DK III #1, written by Frank Miller and Brian Azzarello, with pencils by Andy Kubert and inks by Klaus Janson,
  • Jacked #1, written by Eric Kripke with art by John Higgins, and:
  • Who would win in a drinking contest: Demon In A Bottle Tony Stark, or Alias‘s Jessica Jones (Yes, this was a weird show)!

And now, the disclaimers:

  • We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like learning why Starfox could outdrink Rocket Raccoon (It’s not why you think! It’s filthy!)
  • This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just be aware you will learn the secret origin of Phil Coulson’s Vanity Vehicle.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. Seriously: the whole Starfox / Rocket Raccoon thing is just awful. Get some headphones.
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jessica_jones_netflixYes, we are back. And yes, it has been a long time. Thanks to the horrors of moving, which include misplaced boxes, emergency repairs, rescheduled workmen, and the Fickle Fingering of XFinity, we are only just now able to return to the Internet Airwaves. Thankfully, it was just in time to binge-watch Netflix’s and Marvel Studios’ Jessica Jones, which dropped its entire first season this past Friday.

So we discuss the series, including how, like with Daredevil, it seems about three episodes too long. We talk about how the series compares to Alias, the Brian Michael Bendis-written comic book the series was based on. And we go over how the story works not only as a classic film noir where the femme fatale is actually the hero, and how it can be seen as a tacit examination and deconstruction of Doctor Who.

We also discuss:

  • Secret Six #8, written by Gail SImone with art by Dale Eaglesham and Tom Derenick, and:
  • Star Wars: Vader Down #1, written by Jason Aaron with art by Mike Deodato, Jr.!

And now, the disclaimers:

  • We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like discovering why “Comcast” is an unholy word.
  • This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout out warnings ahead of time, just go into this assuming that we will ruin not only Jessica Jones for you, but also 666 Park Avenue and diaper fetishism.
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. You want your boss to hear a sentence that contains the phrases, “railed,” “in the,” and “heat pump?” Get yourself some headphones.
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Here’s the deal: we were supposed to have Internet access here in the new Home Office yesterday. However, a short-sighted, irritating little company that we’ll call Comcast (because that’s it’s name) said they wouldn’t hook up Internet unless they could confirm that the TV also worked… And considering every TV in this house needs to be wall-mounted, that was a tricky order.

So we will be exposed to the joys of FiOS on Thursday. This means yes, no new show this week, and for that, we apologize.

But rest assured: we have it on good authority that all required equipment will be in place for Thursday, when a nice man with 100 megabit internet will arrive at our door.

There should be a new show next Sunday. Thanks for hanging with us.

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If you’ve been listening to the show for any length of time, you know that we’ve been preparing to move to a new Home Office for a while now.

We prepared for the move by watching a bunch of HGTV, which has a variety of programming showing people picking out a house, sending in handsome contractors who never seem to sweat through their $200 work shirts, and have the homeowners in the new place within 22 minutes.

Those shows are bullshit.

See that picture at the top of the page? That’s three days of unpacking. And we’re not even close to done.

We not only have no Internet access yet, but we can’t get an electrician out to wire our recording studio for Internet, let alone the actual Internet people, until the end of this week. Jesus, we don’t even have cable, which means instead of watching the new Walking Dead or Ash Vs The Evil Dead, we’re watching old X-Files DVDs and pretending it’s research for the upcoming miniseries.

We currently plan to have a new episode next Sunday… But it depends on a lot of electrical things happening between now and then. To be honest, it might be two weeks until we have a new episode.

Thanks for your patience. We will return to our regularly scheduled programming as soon as possible.

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Due to move preparation, we can’t do the show tonight. We should have one up tomorrow… and if you’ve seen tonight’s The Walking Dead, I think you’ll know part of what we’re going to be talking about. Jeezus…

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walking_dead_dead_insideAs we have been for the past several weeks, we remain immersed in the process of moving to a new Home Office. This means that we have spent our week collating documents mundane and obscure, and hunting for documents demanded by Unseen Powers that are so obscure that they apparently Cannot Be Named.

So we welcomed the distraction provided by a universe where, if a man wants a new house, he need but clear it of shambling ghouls and defend it from traitors and raiders. That universe being that of The Walking Dead, which debuted its sixth season last Sunday. So we discuss this magic world that is so blessedly empty of lawyers, mortgage underwriters and real estate brokers. A world that provides not only some of the most stunning visuals this series has ever presented, but which also raises questions about the very nature of morality and the rule of law, in a world where a society’s members, circumstances and requirements can change by the second.

We also discuss:

  • Chewbacca #1, written by Gerry Duggan with art by Phil Noto, and:
  • Uncanny Avengers #1, also written by Gerry Duggan with art by Ryan Stegman!

And, the inevitable disclaimers:

  • We record this show live to tape, with minimal editing. While this might mean a looser comics podcast than you are used to, it also means that anything can happen. Like the avocation of financial, and perhaps physical, sanctions for late comics.
  • This show contains spoilers. While we try to shout warnings ahead of time, be aware that we may ruin the surprise as to who this season of The Walking Dead’s Carl is (fun fact: it might not be Carl!).
  • This show contains adult, profane language, and is therefore not safe for work. We talk a lot about “horrible biological sounds” this week. Think your boss would use that in a positive way in your annual review? Yeah, get some headphones.
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